I'm Known As the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.
The action icon is universally recognized as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also starred in several critically acclaimed comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35th anniversary this December.
The Film and That Line
In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a hardened detective who goes undercover as a elementary educator to locate a fugitive. During the story, the investigation plot serves as a loose framework for the star to have charming moments with his young class. Without a doubt the standout belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and declares the former bodybuilder, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”
That iconic child was played by child star Miko Hughes. In addition to this part encompassed a recurring role on Full House as the bully to the Olsen twins and the haunting part of the resurrected boy in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with multiple films in development. Additionally, he is a regular on fan conventions. Recently shared his memories from the production over three decades on.
A Young Actor's Perspective
Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?
Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.
That's impressive, I can't remember being four. Do you remember anything from that time?
Yeah, to a degree. They're snapshots. They're like mental photographs.
Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?
My mother, mainly would bring me to auditions. Often it was like a cattle call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all simply wait around, go into the room, be in there briefly, deliver a quick line they wanted and then leave. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was the initial content I was reading.
Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?
He was incredibly nice. He was fun. He was pleasant, which I guess isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a productive set. He was fun to be around.
“It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”
I knew he was a big action star because that's what my parents told me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I was eager to interact with him when he was available. He was busy, obviously, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be holding on. He was really, really generous. He bought every kid in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. It was the coolest device, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It eventually broke. I also was given a genuine metal whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.
Do you remember your time filming as being enjoyable?
You know, it's funny, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, looking back now, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the direction of Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the other children would ask for my help to beat difficult stages on games because I could do it, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all little kid memories.
The Infamous Moment
OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember how it happened? Did you grasp the meaning?
At the time, I probably didn't know what the word taboo meant, but I knew it was provocative and it caused the crew to chuckle. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.
“It was a difficult decision for her.”
How it originated, according to family lore, was they were still developing characters. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the kids together, it was more of a collaboration, but they worked on it while filming and, reportedly it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Give me a moment, I need time" and took some time. It was a tough call for her. She said she had doubts, but she believed it will probably be one of the iconic quotes from the movie and history proved her correct.